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The Vegan Vampire

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Once upon a time, I had a very real fear of mad cow disease. I honestly thought it would be the thing that set off the real life zombie apocalypse (and yet I chose to use bird flu in Going Green, go figure). As such, I began to remove meat from my diet. Rather, I tried, but for a while, it looked like mad cow was going to win because I had no guidance in the vegetarian world and I was the kind of person who would eat a salad, feel good about it, then walk int a 7-Eleven for cigarettes and walk out with a hot dog and sense of shame.

But then I met the guy who would become my husband and he was already a vegetarian, making it easier for me to join up, not only because I now had a vegetarian buddy, but because he had a wealth of knowledge about balanced and delicious meals that made me forget meat existed. Well, at first I still ate fish, but after getting one too many poorly prepared dishes and regretting it for hours after, I went entirely vegetarian sometime about a decade ago.

In 201…

Rebooting The Robot

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Ten years ago, I stood on a scale and saw a number that I hadn't previously seen in my adult life. It was a one. A one that was followed by two nines, but that didn't matter. It was a one, and not a two, which had been the only number I'd assumed I'd ever see and I was pretty amazed. I was certain that number meant the end to a number of real and perceived issues and that my life was about to become so perfect that I'd never have another bad day as long as I lived.

Ten years later, I recognize a pattern of expecting everything to be one hundred percent hunky dory if only (insert pipe dream here) were to happen. Most recently was my pie in the sky aspiration of my house magically remaining clean thanks to the installation of my new kitchen. While it is handy to have convenient drawers for everything, we still cook, we still have a dog that insists on shedding, and space for more dishes in the sink just means more can pile up.

But this isn't meant to be a deep di…

It's Time For Awards! The 2019 Vladdies Are Here!

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Greetings, humans. It is once again that time of year where the lazy meat sack steps aside and allows me to share with you the books that were good enough for me to allow your miserable existence to continue for another year. Though let's face it, there really was no stepping aside this year. Has she done anything at all to merit her continued relevance? Does one single month of "spooky" stories count as blogging? She claims she's been busy this year. Busy with what, I ask?




But enough about the meat sack who hasn't published anything at all in 2019, this post is about authors who are writing books and good ones at that. How good? Good enough to keep me from destroying your planet, and as we all know, evil kill-bot overlords are not easily impressed and our primary function is to destroy all humans, so these must be pretty good. Now that we've got that established, on to the awards.

Best Self-Aware YA Urban Fantasy Victoria Marmot and the Meddling Goddess by Vir…

Spooky Season Part Four: The Night I Called Myself

Well, here we are. It's Halloween and I've been saving my spookiest true story for today. Now, to preface, this is going to be a somewhat long story. I originally started writing this as part of a book idea that never panned out and while I was writing, I went off on a bunch of tangents about where I was living at the time. I've tried to clean them up as much as I could, but in case it still comes out as a meandering adventure in word salad, here are a few highlights you need to know:
My apartment was on the third floor of a house in what could have been considered a "bad" neighborhood, but several locked doors existed between me and the street.This was the late nineties. I had a land line and dial-up internet.The house was old and there were MANY housing code violations, including two separate front doors (one of which opened to my bedroom), crawlspaces with exposed wires and nails presented as "storage space," and most notably, a ceiling lamp with an …

Spooky Season Part Three: Hush Hush, Keep It Down Now

Most hardcore ghost hunters and those of us who want to believe will tell you that ghosts are more than just ethereal visions of people in posh Victorian garb quietly reading in the library. Sometimes the presence of otherworldly spirits appear as unusually cold spots, floating orbs, or even sounds. In fact, one of the most popular bits of "proof" that ghosts exist come in the form of sounds and patterns in EMF fields. Which of course, can usually be attributed to auditory pareidolia. 
Pareidolia is the perception of patterns out of randomness. Whenever you hear about someone who has seen the face of Elvis on their toast or the miraculous emergence of Jesus from the knotty pine of their paneling, that’s pareidolia. This can also happen with sound. Everything from the washing machine spin cycle to the sound of cars passing by creates white noise. Anyone concentrating hard enough is going to be able to pick out paying close enough attention is going to hear something in that …